as i see time pass by
everyone pass with her
paling, laughing, singing, and crying
and I remain there with out movement so no one can see me
i think no one will take me in count that way
this is how i plan to stay away from everyone
away from everything that can hurt me
stay steel until the next day
and keep on staying steel until i die

red, orange, and green ,trees
they all fall from the grown
they start falling one by one
after five of them had fall then
then you have to be car full
don't come out of your house or you will die
that's when it all start
and the war begins
the killing begins

every year that passes by has something new with them
so exalting to wait for them
to see what they have in command
to see what its going to bring you
what events you might have
what new places you might go to
how many times it might make you cry
how many times you might laugh with him
or even don't have shit to do
but be there in chair and see how it passes by
so sad but yet so happy
meting new people
losing people to
that is part of every year
that is why you need to love him
and never let him down
cause he bring you new things to do
new people to love
or simply he won't bring you shit to do

people every were i go
they all know me
they all know my name
it seems that i can't escape
i tray to hide from everyone
but it seem i can't
my escaping plans seem not to work anymore
its then that i find a never before seen map
that's were i see my homeland
that's how i get to the place that i always saw in my dreams
the place were no one knows me
were there's only sand, water and trees
a place were no body knows me
were i can began a new life

SCARED MEMORIES

As I sit in a bar drinking my problems way
I cry there feeling betrayed, and hurt
But wait why I’m I here? What I gain?
You caused all these tears
You made me in to the monster I’ve become
Each beating you have me scared me for life
Scars that will never go away
I look at my scared body and also feel the scars in my heart
Reliving in my mind the times you became a beast
The breath that smelled like alcohol
Became a warning sing for me
Your big hands seemed as hard stones that kept pressing my face and parts of my body that it could hit
My pleading never stopped you, you kept doing it even more as if my “no’s” were “more”
Your threats keep me being by your side
I felt like a bird being imprisoned in my own cage
At the moment I got the flashback to the one day
The day that ended in the unexpected
You walk in as I was cooking, Drunk as always,
Trying to force me into doing something I didn’t want
You keep kissing me but your kissed disgusted me
I told you to stop but you kept on going
At that instant my mind thought about everything you did to me
And with out thinking my knife penetrated you more then one time
After coming into my senses I looked at what I had done to you
I didn’t feel sorry for you
I believe that I gave you and easy way out of life than what you deserved
I cleaned up and put you were no one would find you or look for you
And now I sit here in this bar trying to drink my problems away but I stop and think
I have no more problems I’m in peace

So sweet like the sugar
So hard like a rock
She hurts you
When she less pretends no to hurt you
But yet she says she love you
Its all false
She never did
She never will
So don’t worry your alone
You will always be alone
She will never love you

so big but yet so small
so far away but yet so near
so gray that it makes me turn gray
they say that a rabet lives there
it hase its on city
a big city and town for here self
do wht she please
but so lonly
no one to play with
no one to talk to
thats when she wanders were it all go
she turs to earth
wait what dose she sees
childrens playinng and talking about there day
she crys noone can play with her or talk to her
poor moon so lonly
that i wish i can play with her

with no end and no start 

black and dark so dark that we can't see our self's

I stand there by my self 

in the middle of the empty row way

no cars no animals no people 

only me but far far away i see 

i see i don't know what i see 

wait i think its me

yes its me me when i was nine 

nine so small but yet so big 

wait what I'm i doing there

who is that men why is he touching me 

I'm crying no don't cray 

its okay someone will safe you

mami will be there soon and killed him 

killed him for what his done to her little girl

but the pain were will the pain go

yes this row will take them with her 

and then you won't suffer any more

 

 

 

i was there in a white room 

were i was the only one in there 

there was no objects no nothing

but me in the room 

in the white room 

empty and scary

with a felling that the was going to be my last day

i wasn't hurt but i felt hurt

i felt a big paint

its then i saw a shadow

i didn't know who it was

but it was then that i felt 

safe like nothing and no one was going to hurt me

that was my last breath that was the last day that i was alive  

 

  

 

al comensar del dia tantas personas disfrutan de un lugar hermoso

se van volando volando asia ese hermoso lugar

esta lleno de personas que deseavan conocser 

personas que tenian anos que no las mirarvan 

alfinar se vuelven a encontrar

es entonses que se dan cuenta que seran feliz feliz para siempre

que siempre podran estar con las personas que mas quieren y nunca se iran 

fue el comienso de ese dia que la muerte llego y les dio el regalo mas lindo de todo el mundo

el regalo que tanto deseavan

y los llevara asi ese lugar que siempre quisieron llegar

happy cemetery full of life
children's playing every were
birds walking around the cemetery
admiring the wings of the children's
wishing they can have them too
to be able to fly like they do
play and hide in between the clouds
but wait what is going on
were is everyone going
its' only 3 a.m.
don't go stay and play with me
i can't flay but i can play
don't go
know I'm alone alone in this cemetery again
paling with the bounds of dead people
pretending they are fun to play with
what now wait until tomorrow so they can come back
then they will be gone
and i will have to wait again and play with there bounds

were did everything go
were was i then
was it all a dream
i was there by my self
laying on my bed
my body seem to be hurt
i was confused
didn't know what was going on
i was only eight years old
i was a little girl
was it all a nightmare
how many times was i hurt
how many mornings they i woke up like this
i want to know where was i then
i want to no were was everyone at then

the sun burning hot so hot
that it seems to be no way out
sand,sand and more sand
im going to die in the middle of nowere
i ran,ran and rand
but it seem like i don't get anywere
i'm going to die
skin is so dray
i'm so hot
my lips are so dry
i need water but there is only sand
i'm daing and there is no way out

white, red. and black snow
they all fall from the trees
dark and white, chocalets falling from the sky
kids running outside playing
traing to get as many choclates as they can
they all fall to the grownd
but they are all gone
they seem to desapier
kids looking for them
seeing were they all go
but all they see is the snow
snow that falls from the trees
white,red,and black snow

people cry in the middle of the rain 

claiming everyone they lost 

but the question they all ask 

is who lost more

it's then that it all turns into a war 

a war that seem to never end

it's now that I don't know if they cry because they lost some one really impotent

or because there in pain

pain of knowing they are about to get killed

that they will not cray in the middle of the rain anymore

but they will day in the middle of the rain 

and never cry again

todo comiensa con un "hola como estas"

despues se van conosiendo poco a poco 

pero y despues que pasa cuando te das cuenta que ya no puedas vivir sin esa persona

que nesesitas verlo todos los dias 

cuando saves que si no lo miras por un dia sientes que el mundo sete viene en sima

cuando sientes que sin el no puedes respirar 

cuando te das cuenta que tu vida y todo el mundo jira al rededor de ustedes dos

    pero es entonses que encuentras que ai un gran obstaculo que inpide que todo el mundo sepa lo que sienten

ese algo que constantemente ocasiona peleas entre ustudes dos 

aunque lo que sientas entre ustedes dos sea muy fuerte

que en ocasines no se puedan ver 

que si andan caminando juntos se tienen que separar

disimular que se conosen 

aperentar que no les importa lo que les suseda a cada uno

dime pues como actuo entonses

 

In the middle of a big city there I was alone
Where people were walking all over the place
Some looking like if they didn’t know were they were going
Some criticizing others
Buildings every were, I turn
Scary and really big it seemed that they can touch the sky
People bumping in to each others I felt scared
I wanted to go back back to were I came from
Back to the small town were every one new each other
Were people knew were they were going
But I was scared of not being welcome any more
Of people not knowing me any more
Fear that people will hate me
Now I don’t have no were to go
I’m alone alone in this city that is as big as the sky
Were I don’t belong
In a place that I don’t feel welcome

I sit in a white room,
I look up at the clock.
The time seems as it has stopped.
The nerves I have seemed to get bigger and there’s adrenaline running through my body that I can’t explain.
Something inside of me tells me to walk out to retract myself from the decision I’m making.
The thoughts in my head feel like a knot in a rope, so hard to untangle.
The man in the white robe walks in and asks the one question that has tormented me for the past hour.
“Miss are you ready?” As he begins the procedure I feel a slight sting in my arm that takes me away from the thoughts, the world, the time.
In that journey I reflect on the decision that was taken and I want to retract, but there’s no turning back.
A feeling of dizziness and confusion was what I felt when I woke up.
As I walked out of there, something caught my attention, it was a woman holding a beautiful child in her hands.
Right then I realized I was a cowardly monster that took the spark, the shine, the life of something that could have been wonderful and replaced it with a dark empty space inside of me.

Shoes

  Running in the park,

 Walking in the street,

            Standing still where I pleased

     My beautiful shape,  

       My rich texture with a radiant color everyone can see

Oh how I did, show off as entered the rooms

I could feel their envy as I passed by

   

Could it have been the curvy shape?

Or the way I was beautifully made?

But, now it's not what it used to be

On and off so many times

Old and torn

The color has faded 

The shape has

disappeared 

I sit in the closet

Where no one sees, or remembers how popular and beautiful

I used to be   

       

I remember perfectly like it was yesterday
seeing the body of the woman who once said was my mother
her body firmly laying there
motionless, helpless, blood dripping from open wounds
she does not feel, touch or shout all that is left is flesh
the flesh of the monster that will never hurt me again
as a child she pretended to be the right mother
so loving and caring in the end it seemed to be a nightmare
I couldn't wake up of years pass
her presence with in me felt stronger
her happiness brought me sadness
I felt as I was a slave chained to her anger,hate and commands
my fragile arms bruised my body aching in pain
the fury running through my veins my pulse telling me to destroy the object of my torture
I feel satisfaction the pleasure of ending my suffering
I FEEL NO REGRETS

Nayis

Hello 

       

      welcome!!!!!!!!

    Here you will be reading a little about me and how I think. You will be able to learn about me by my writing.

      I hope you like it!!!!!!!